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    Love, Drugs and Dancing

    Reaction King Alena

    Posts : 1
    Join date : 2013-11-14

    Love, Drugs and Dancing Empty Love, Drugs and Dancing

    Post by Reaction King Alena on Sun Nov 24, 2013 6:01 pm

    "Look at you, you're a drug addict, you drink and you smoke a lot. You're like your own cancer waiting to happen." He cried to me as I lit another cigarette. "I don't think I can watch you do this to yourself anymore."
    "Then, stop watching me."
    "B-but.." I blew a big fat ring of smoke around him, he coughed and sighed. It maybe not have been the best idea but he wasn't going to take victim in what I do with my life anymore. I don't care anymore. I didn't want him wasting his time on me. The more I pushed him away, the closer he came, he hugged me, he's kissed me and showered me with love and affection. Is it sad to say, that I'm no good for him. Despite the fact we were never together. He always wanted the best for me. But I gave up the best in me years ago. I couldn't dance anymore, and for that reason, I started taking drugs, all kinds of things to make the pain and the hurting go away. The stress was killing me so I started drinking. My vision became hazy, everything was slurred. I started seeing people in my head. I couldn't manage to do anything right, and then I gave up all together. I couldn't do it anymore.
    "Leave me. I'm no longer good for you. I just want the best for you but it's not good for you to stick around and hang with a loser like me. You have your whole life ahead of you. You wouldn't want me. You don't need me."
    "B-but I .. I .. I... Love you. I love you so much. That, there is no one else I'd rather be with, it's only you I wanted."
    "But-" he planted his lips on mine. The smooth creases of his lips connected with mine as his tears ran down his face. Watching him cry was the last thing I wanted him to do. I never wanted him to cry because of me. I'm not worth his tears. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him closely, his lips still locked on mine causing a heated erection that boiled every time he touched my skin. "I just want to love you. I just want to be with you. I don't care that you can't dance anymore. I loved you for you."
    "Please .. Stop..."
    "No, I won't stop. I won't stop being at your side. I won't stop caring and I will never ever ever stop caring. I only love you."

    That's what he told me a couple years ago. . .

    A couple weeks after, I started going to a rehab for my leg. It still hurt really badly but I could manage. It was slowly getting better. Even though I still had the drinking and smoking and consuming drugs problem, he was there at my side comforting me, telling me, I don't need this. And it's true, I did not need this. He, he became my new obsession, and I only wanted to do things for him, to benefit his world. He was my drug. I don't like using the word use but, I was using him in all the good ways. Whenever I was sad, I would come to him for comfort, whenever I was mad, he'd let me have sex with him to get all the raging, heated emotions that I had. And he'd never want anything from me, but my happiness. Surely, I wanted to do things for him. I'd like to take him out on a date, or go for a walk. But he'd say no, he'd like having me for comfort and he'd rather stay here and make sure I became better and that made me sad.
    3 weeks after I finished my therapy, I started looking for jobs into choreography. He got me back on my feet and over time, I had the moves like Jagger. We took it easy but, every time we practiced, I felt better and started remembering dance moves. Every day, he teaches me something and I learn from him. He was so gentle even though there was times he pushed me to my limit. I wanted to hate him but, it was so hard to. He got me to where I was today, I don't know where I'd be without him. And the funny thing is, I don't remember ever telling him thank you.
    One night, I decided to finally ask him out on a date. We were in my room that night, he was making tea when I decided to ask him.
    "Um... I .. I was just wondering, can I I mean... Would you like to , go on a date with me? " he looked at me and cocked his head to the side.
    "Would you like to go out, with me? On a date of course."
    "You're asking me out on a date, tonight?"
    "It doesn't have to be tonight. I just want to go out with you, take you out. Thank you for all the time where you were there for me. And also.. "
    "I can't go out with you." I paused and blinked. I wasn't in shock. I wasn't surprised. I was just.. disappointed, and kind of sad. I wasn't expecting him to say no however, I was hoping he wouldn't turn me down. I went back to watching television. He looked at me and handed me a cup of tea. I looked up to him and gave him a plain face. He gave me a sad face. "It's not that I don't want to go out with you but..." He kneeled down to my level and caressed my jawline. I didn't even realize that I started to cry.
    "No, don't worry about it. Don't.."
    "No please, don't cry. It's just.. It's just.. I'm getting married."
    "You're what?!"
    "Getting married to .."
    "Getting married!"
    "Yes." I still wasn't shocked, wasn't surprised but, disapponted. Again. I just smiled at him, and hugged him.
    "Congratulations to you."
    "But.. "
    "No, congrats to you.." I got up from the chair and grabbed a carton of cigarettes and went up to the roof. It was a very serious dark night, everything was quiet and dark. I lit up a cigarette and put it in my mouth, took in a big swig and exhaled sadly. Marriage? I didn't know he was getting married. Well, I mean I'm not surprise. He's so handsome, he's a great person, not surprised, not surprised at all. And I don't want to hold him back. To go back and tell him no. I don't want him to get married. To stay and be with me and just love me forever. But that's me holding him back, and I don't want that for him.
    "Hey," I turned to him. He looked up to me. His innocent but fierce stare imbued into my face, I couldn't look at him, I felt so hurt for some reason even though I had no reason to be. He cupped my face and looked at me. "Hey!"
    "Drop your cigarette."
    "Because, drop it and kill it."
    "Do it." I dropped my cigarette and stepped on it.
    "Good, now kiss me."
    "B-but..." He stared into my soul and I pulled him closely and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around my neck as I lift him at least 5 inches off the ground. Indulging in his scent, loving him all over. "But your getting married, I can't." I pushed him away. "It no longer feels right."
    "You never let me finish. I was getting married.
    "You've said that so many times."
    "Married, to you. "
    "W-what?" From out his pocket he held out a ring. I dropped down to my knees and started crying. I don't understand why I was crying. There was so much mixed emotions in me, I didn't know whether to be happy, mad, sad. I just burst out crying.
    "No, no don't cry please don't cry."
    "What the heck?! Why did you and.. But why, just why?!"
    "We'll because, I love you. So, will you marry me?" I stared at him, stared at the ring, stared back at him and started to cry again, I was an emotional wreck. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly.
    "Yes, a hundred times yes."

      Current date/time is Wed Jun 19, 2019 11:49 pm